The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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