Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Randomize
