he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
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