You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
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