her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Randomize
