I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Randomize
