I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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