dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
