Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Randomize