i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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