Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
i out mim tonsoeep
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