If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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