Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
Randomize