He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
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