Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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