it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
