Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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