he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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