I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
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I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
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We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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