Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
sex in a hospital.. check
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize
