For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
