I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
