Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Randomize
