Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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