I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
