Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
