my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.