She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy