Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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