i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
