i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
