You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
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