Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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