he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
