Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
