WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
Well douche your snatch and let's go!
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
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