I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
