My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Randomize
