why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize