So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
