it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
We are all done wearing pants today
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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