Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Randomize
