I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
