I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
