OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
