awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
You ruined the universe
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Randomize
