Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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