Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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