I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
