3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
