Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
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