don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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