I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Randomize
